Holiday Wrap Up

This year, I was a Grinch. I started off kind of wary of the Christmas/New Year season. Then, I decided it was all about making it happen. So, I got myself psyched up about putting up the huge tree from my Grandmother (which we'll never ever use again because it is ENORMOUS), wrapping the one present I had to give, and dressing the little S family up in Red and Black because "That's our style, yo."

So, the day came and went. I was not without medication so we all came out without bloodshed. I was glad to see it go though. For the first time ever, I took my tree down before time for New Year ball-dropping. It was down as soon as we came home from our visiting. I was even so grinchy to decide that from now on, we'll have a table-top tree because we do so much traveling anyway. Ok, maybe that's just practical instead of grinchy.

But today is January 1, 2010. I decided that this year, "Twenty-Ten" because it sounds more Science Fictiony than Two Thousand Ten according to my father-in-law (to whom I owe a lot of my happiness--SHOUTOUT! That takes too much time and uncharacteristic sentimentality to explain; just accept it.), would be the best year of my life yet. After that, I decided I'd declare that every year until I'm dead and maybe even them some more. I'm not THINKING negative thoughts.

I am going to work hard and play harder. I am going to show up for work early. I am going to scoop the litter box every day. I am going to fold the laundry the same day that it comes out of the dryer unless some playing needs to be done first. I am going to kiss my daughter even when she pouts when I try. I am going to squeeze as much EVERYTHING (good and bad because fruit has seeds) out of every day. And that's it.

Now. The holidays? I am not going to remember them with exhaustion and debt. I am going to remember what made them special.

My daughter opened presents. Sure, she liked her kitty and purple afro doll better than any of the neat things that made noise and taught her ABCs, but she enjoyed herself. So many people said "Amelia just makes Christmas for me." Other people enjoyed themselves. Lastly, I have people in my life that love me so much that they know really special and thoughtful gifts to give me. My mom got me three different sets of post-it notes (and matching magnets!). I don't know anyone but my mom that has an appreciation for office supplies that matches mine. Luke's parents got me a snowflake obsidian earrings and necklace set. They know my favorite stone. Yes, I have a favorite stone. Yes, it is a flash hardened magma. Yes, I'm specific enough that it is snowflake obsidian. It became my favorite stone when Mrs. Dillon took us to Luray Caverns and I fell in love with the beautiful black-and-white shiny, tiny stone. My favorite Uncle (yeah, I even discriminate uncles. Not aunts though. They're all my favorites.) got me an iPod touch. He consistently spoils me rotton, and I've had to charge that thing every day since because I'm getting so much use out of it. I'm basically obsessed. Sure, these are all material things, but they are also representative of the attention paid and love shown to me by the people that matter the most.

And even though we're flat broke and have a subscription to Netflix, Luke got me the new Harry Potter dvd because he knows how badly I wanted to see it and add it to my complete collection. All of this while he thinks Harry Potter is ridiculous. (Well...thought. He finally figured out that the story is very similar to the Star Wars story.)

So, the holidays are over and I'm feeling much better. I guess that is why so many people love the holidays so much. It has this way of sneaking a little bit of happiness in on you.

I've broken my trend of doing a neat little fragmented blog post at the end of the year summarizing my past 365 days in ambiguous phrases. That's over along with the O-something decade. I am really glad to see it go. I had a lot of really awesome things happen during that ten years, but the next ten are going to be awesome. I'll make sure of that. I'll forget the bad (bad rhymes with Chad...haha) and write the good in stone.

Amelia will have her first real steps. (STOP JUDGING HER! SHE IS CAUTIOUS!) She might tell me stories like her daddy and go on and on forever and never really find the point and I will love it because I will love watching her get excited over anything at all. Or she will tell me stories like her Papaw and awe me with her cleverness. Maybe she will tell me stories like her Papa and make everything tear-worthy. She will attack me with kisses, learn to read, chase the cat, drive me nuts, and probably eat a few more crayons (Hey. I get it. They really do have an awesome texture AND smell. I wanted Sharpie, Febreze, and hand sanitizer when I was pregnant with her.)

So, no holiday letter this year. No Christmas cards either. You all know how to get to my pictures of my glorious daughter. I'll give you prints if you want some. If I could erase the whole year and start over, I wouldn't. That's way too freaking scary. Plus, 2010 will harvest some experiences and goals and opportunities that would never have come around had all of the bad parts of 2009 not happened. I like the sound of 2010 better anyway. I'm not goint to say "thousand" in the year name. It sounds snooty. We all need a little more sci-fi in our lives anyway, right?

So, I love you. I know you love me. I really appreciate it. I can't express my feelings very well, so knowing that you love me anyway really means a lot. :)

Happy New Year. Good Luck. Godspeed.

(Oh! And if you remember, please say a little prayer for me or send some good thoughts my way on January 5.)